Heavy is the head that wears the crown.

Is it just me . . . or is the short work week between Christmas and New Year’s a consummate waste of time? After a post holiday orgy of turkey, stuffing, shortbread, and epic quantities of Aunt Helen’s eggnog, chances are the average employee is five pounds heavier and has the mental stamina of a catatonic moose.

Of course, this isn’t the case for those brave souls of the retail world who must stay lean and alert lest they be trampled by the impatient hordes of post-holiday shoppers who descend on the Boxing Day sales with all the calm of a class five hurricane.

But for those of us whose work environment includes conference calls, emails, and superfluous strategy meetings there is zero incentive to be the least bit productive. In years past, I have looked forward to this time of year knowing full well that no one expects me to do anything more strenuous than focusing on shallow breathing because my slacks no longer fit!

This year was quite different. I share supervision responsibilities with two other regional sales managers. At some point in the year I must have disappointed the human resources gods because no one thought to tell me that my counterparts, and their managers, would be taking the week off. This left me in charge of the entire country for three whole days.

Normally this wouldn’t cause me to dissolve into a little puddle of anxiety but we had recently outsourced our customer service department. The powers-that-be, in their infinite wisdom chose a company with many testimonials as to their overall friendliness; a highly valued trait in a call centre, to be sure! Too bad none of these references mentioned that they were also an extremely laid back bunch whose response times matched those of a herd of arthritic turtles!

My organization sells financial products and we employ commissioned salespeople who happen to be a rather emotional bunch. Whenever a client’s issue isn’t dealt with in a timely manner the subsequent phone calls I receive tend to ignite my hair. Therefore I viewed my having to baby sit over five hundred of these passionate professionals as somewhat akin to facing an army of angry radicals armed only with a policy manual and a potato peeler!

It’s also hard to differentiate between what constitutes an actual crisis and what is a simple case of a sales representative bowing to a client’s every whim. Each is equally expressed as a 911 emergency situation requiring everyone’s immediate attention or 1) The client will cancel, 2) The sales representative will lose a commission, 3) The world will stop rotating, the ice caps will melt, and life as we know it will come to an end! (Tip - Getting a 'A' in drama in high school is a prerequisite for becoming a successful sales representative.)

As I look back over the past three days, and reflect on the many gratifying (?) experiences, I realize that it will take several bottles of good Merlot to quiet my nerves and dull the pain. I think I'll include the wine under 'Service Awards' on my next expense report!